December 25, 2009


Christmas festivities included:

- As previously reported, champagne, sleeping pills (and, hence, sleep)

- Counting the number of times I kissed beaks today (like, 10)

- Vietnamese spring rolls (4)

- Shaving my legs as my gift to myself (took 2 razors! Fuck.)

- Traveling between three grocery stores at 12:15am trying to do my grocery shopping. Number of grocery stores closed = 3

- Drinking at a local dive in order to be around people (number of drinks = 4)

- Observing folks playing frisbee in the street in my neighborhood (3)

- Tallying the types of candy my mom sent me in my stocking (7)

- Watching popes being knocked down by crazy women (1)

- Playing scrabble online with Facebook friends (4)

- Attempting to make a purchase at local pharmacies that had been robbed (1)

- Noting a live Christmas tree that was already thrown out on the sidewalk (1)

- Singing "Crimson and Clover" while driving myself around town looking at Christmas lights (number of times sung approximately = 6 1/2)

- Counting the number of times spent feeling sorry for myself for being alone at Christmas (842)

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