My good friend's mother is coming into town tomorrow to stay until January 22. (Christ!) Awhile back she asked me if I would be willing to keep her vibrator at my house until her mother is gone.
She's got a decent-size place, and I asked her why she couldn't just hide it somewhere at her house (top of a closet? bottom of a dresser drawer?). She said that while she was at work her mother would most likely entertain herself by reorganizing her shelves, closets, cabinets, and drawers. (Double Christ!)
I said, "What's the big deal if she finds it? It's not like you have porn with animals or small children."
She said, "As far as my mother knows I've never even had sex, and I don't want her to know about this, either!"
So I said, "Sure. I'll hide it for you. Just, uh, wrap it up in a plastic bag or something."
I hadn't thought about that conversation in awhile, and just a short time ago she called to see if I wanted to meet her for dinner. After we made plans for when and where to meet, she suddenly started talking in a more rapid, high-pitched voice and said, "I'll bring my thing for you to take, too."
"Your what?" I asked.
"My THING!" she repeated with emphasis.
"What THING are you talking about?" (I was clueless at this moment.)
She groaned in embarrassment, and said, "You know! The thing I asked you to keep for me!" She was silently begging me to understand.
Suddenly I did understand. "Oh! Yeah, right. Okay bring it. And wrap it up!" So the vibrator transaction will take place in a few hours. It's probably one of the stranger favors I've ever done for a friend.
2 comments:
Christ, just take your friend AND her mother to Good Vibes and get it over with. "Mom, um...I have sex."
She's Chinese! She's expected not to have sex until she's married.
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