List Slam

Last night I attended a "List Slam." People brought in their to-do and not to-do lists and read them to others. I love odd stuff like this. Because I am a gargantuan dork, I sat and made lists of other people's lists because I wanted to remember them as much as possible. (I know: sad, isn't it?)

Here are a couple of highlights:

1. A list that a man new to San Francisco made of the things he wanted to do:

--look for meaning and insignificance
--stick head in sink full of water and try to hold breath as long as possible
--stare with longing at the sky
--stare at the bay; ask the bay 'why?'
--play music loud in room for 5 minutes while dancing naked to Bullworth soundtrack with cock flapping

2. A list a man made of advice to give to his son when he turned 21 (the son is currently 17, and I would argue that he could use this now, but anyway...):

--invest time in a hopeless cause you believe in
--when talking to a child, kneel down so you're on their level
--when your true love stands before you naked and asks you if she looks fat, tell her the truth: she is beautiful
--learn to salsa and tango--you'll never be alone
--find male friends who can talk about things other than sports, cars, and gadgets. Guys can be soulmates, too.
--send your little sister flowers for no particular reason. She'll always remember that moment.

3. A young woman sitting next to my friends and I had made a list of 'Reasons to stop seeing Mike.' She'd decided not to read it and crumpled it into a ball. We urged her on, "Read it! It'll be perfect!" She kept saying, "No one else wants to hear this stuff!" We finally convinced her, and she got up in front of everyone, smoothed out her list, and read it. It was, indeed, a wonderful list. But one reason to stop seeing Mike stood out, in particular:

--Because I know you better than you know me.